"Shame" is a Four-Letter Word

I sent a letter to the editor (of The Record) regarding the closing of the FAITH facility and Peter's Place in Hackensack by the city powers. The closings resulted from the city’s refusal to authorize the groups to continue via some kind of licensing or permit.

My letter was one of three letters that took exception to a letter from the head of a business organization that applauded the city's and county's actions. It is unusual for the Record to print letters in response to letters.

The editor chose to exclude 3 very tiny parts of my letter … irksome, in general ... but one is very troubling in a larger sense.

The first excision was a footnote reminding readers that Peter’s Place was named for Ethical Culture’s deceased and much beloved member, Peter Jacobsohn.

The second omission was a two-word exclamation: “Wake up!” which preceded: “There will always be those who suffer every day ... who will never be ‘cured’ by a long-term solution.”

Most importantly, they omitted my closing words: "Shame, shame on you and Hackensack!"

It seems that "shame" is a four-letter word.

“Shaming” used to lead to shunning, a powerful religious sanction. It resulted in a total ostracism from the community. Would that it still had some effect.

Our nation’s administration, members of congress, agency heads and presidential appointees exhibit no shame. They deny guilt and stonewall investigations or try to prevent discovery or destroy records, but even when caught, never say: "I am sorry" and never admit shame. The guilty are defiant or believe their only crime was getting caught. Why? Do they not feel any shame? If not, why not? Is there no moral and ethical undergirding, thus the term is irrelevant?

Why didn’t the editor keep the denouncement in my letter? Is there a taboo on accusations or judgments of that sort? Does it not reflect where I am coming from? Rightly or wrongly, I represent a humanist religious organization whose very name proclaims ethics! And therefore morals. And therefore the right to say j’accuse.

Sure, the editor can hide behind saying the letter was too long (by six words), but I suspect something else. Wouldn’t you?

Bob Gordon
President, Ethical Culture Society of Bergen County